the next change we need

Our newspaper of record reports the dilemma posed by Jon Stewart: “The press can hold it’s [sic] magnifying glass up to our problems bringing them into focus, illuminating issues heretofore unseen or they can use that magnifying glass to light ants on fire and then perhaps host a week of shows on the sudden, unexpected, dangerous-flaming ant epidemic.” Undeterred by its second horn, the same issue offers Paul Krugman an opportunity to kvetch:

This is going to be terrible. In fact, future historians will probably look back at the 2010 election as a catastrophe for America, one that condemned the nation to years of political chaos and economic weakness.

For my part, the road ahead is so bright, I gotta tint my windshield. Unremitting financial hegemony of the smartest guys in the room doing “God’s work”, compounded by the executive arrogance of the καλοὶ κἀγαθοὶ extolling their likes as “very savvy businessmen”, have precipitated popular hatred of public intellectuals who have concluded that their responsibilities are to power alone. This hatred cannot be quelled by appeals to reason. As a result of universal suffrage, American politics needs rationality like a fish needs a bicycle. Its proper remedy is homeopathic, a dosage of President Palin galvanizing resentment against empowering stupid people, in a welcome reversal of the instant scenario.

der stand der dinge

28 October 2010, 19:44 p.m. around 4759-4799 Prospect Ave, Los Angeles, CA 90027, heading east in a red 2005 Cadillac CTS-V, about to turn left on N. Vermont Ave following an LA Metro 180/181 bus, followed by a Toyota sedan. All windows in my car are down, Nick Cave’s “John Finn’s Wife” blaring out. A stocky tattooed skinhead runs up to the driver’s door and reaches inside:
—Let me in, let me in, they’re going to shoot me!
—What do you think I’m going to do with this?
(This is my SIG P49 with its hammer cocked and safety off, held across my chest aimed at his sternum.)
—Let me in, let me in!
I thrust the gun into the window:
—Don’t repeat yourself. Fight or run.
The spaz staggers back and slows down long enough for me to follow the Metro bus up Vermont.

Lesson taught: An unarmed carjacker in Hollywood goes home empty-handed.
Lesson learned: Pack a big gun. I’d rather drive away than shoot an unarmed man. To that end, I wouldn’t have wanted to back up my commands with anything smaller than a service pistol.